District of Columbia - Results from a recent Pew Research Center survey conclude that display window mannequins are just plain dumb.
"We never realized just how unintelligent they are," remarked Head Pew Survey & Data Manager, Nilanthi Samaranayake. "Until now, that is."
Although many people often mistake the quiet, reflective nature of mannequins as a sign of wisdom, Ms. Samaranayake emphatically rejects that claim. She cites their inability to perform even the simplest of tasks as evidence that they are actually quite vacant.
"We started out with some fairly complex items like figuring out a Rubik's Cube and then worked backwards," she continued. "We then asked them a simple battery of questions, such as 'What is your name?' and 'What is your favorite color?' When they could not answer, we realized then that we were really on to something."
So no matter what someone else tells you -- despite their 'pretty faces', those heads in the window are pretty dumb.
