The world of criminal investigation was cockahoop today after billionaire fish-faced eccentric Elon Musk revealed his latest invention. At a press conference, Musk wore one of his new prosthetic noses and was able to identify three members of the press as paedophiles, who were quickly taken away for further questioning.
The "paedo-sniffer" is a revolution in nasal virtual reality. Musk has developed a device that allows someone to smell individual molecules. In this case, skatole molecules, which are commonly found on paedophiles, are detected by the device, which trigger a smell to the wearer similar to buttered popcorn.
The effectiveness of the device is still to be formally tested, but Musk suggests that it has 100% success rate, unless the wearer is in a cinema or other location where buttered popcorn is present.
He plans to release another version of the device that will allow the wearer to smell Uber drivers.
