After a year-long intensive survey conducted by the TAVISTOCK MIND CONTROL UNIT a list of Mankind's most important inventions has been published.
The learned work of 666 pages with full explanatory notes was compiled by director of the project Hiram Abiff Blair, cousin of ex-British Prime Minister Tony Blair founder of the The Royal Battersea Asylum for the Totally Beguiled.
We have here abbreviated the massive work to the actual list.
Here it is in all its glory:
Mankind's Most Important Inventions.
1. Toilet Roll.
4. Tooth paste.
5. Canned Baked Beans.
7. Ear plugs.
8. Police Force.
11. The lie.