A recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine has concluded that every activity you perform brings you one step closer to death.
DR David Katz published an article that suggests that nobody has really discovered the perfect healthy lifestyle because "we all end up dead."
"It's a pretty basic concept, really," the doctor said, defending his position, "if anyone had found a way to truly live healthy then there would be somebody out there that doesn't stop living."
Asked if he saw any activity that seemed to increase the chances that someone might actually achieve the goal of unlimited longevity, Dr. Katz stated, "sleep is the only activity that doesn't seem to contribute to this march toward oblivion."
He did add one caveat to his statement, "unfortunately, sleep is basically a rehearsal for being dead, so it's not like you gain anything from doing it."
The doctor did explain that some activities do seem to increase life expectancy,"moderate exercise and a sensible diet do seem to prolong the inevitable, but not to the degree that i would suggest them to someone who has more fun sitting on the couch watching Family Feud while downing cheese curls and Mellow Yellow. Also, notice that exercising too much or following an extreme diet just seem to make you dead quicker. Even exercising and eating right are just time sucks that leave you that much closer to death. Every activity that you do is just another tick on your personal doomsday clock, whether you believe what you are doing is good for you or not. The best you can hope for is being able to say, "I'm not dead yet."" the doctor expounded.
Asked if he had any suggestions for someone that wanted to pursue a healthy lifestyle Dr. Katz offered, "you only live once, so I would suggest focusing on pursuits that make the short time you have as enjoyable as possible."
