Philae Comet Lander Was Sponsored By Extreme Tumble Drying Organization

Funny story written by Auntie Jean

Sunday, 16 November 2014

image for Philae Comet Lander Was Sponsored By Extreme Tumble Drying Organization
European Space Lab doing pre-flight checks.

After the "Extreme Sports Tumble Drying Club" admitted its clandestine sponsorship of the Rosetta "on comet" space clothes drying mission, the mission ground to a halt yesterday. The Rosetta spacecraft's landing module, Philae, a $2m black bodywork pimped tumble drier, has come out of hiding now that the orbiter craft, Rosetta refuses to go along with any more "childish" games.

A series of programed games was initiated by a landing related malfunction and the European mission control staff have just realised that a game of hide and seek had been triggered off. Additionally the lander has been spotted depleting its batteries by secretly drying clothes on a 'full load anti-crease' setting for 12 hours. The tumble drier has an automatically extending clothes line with it, but this failed to deploy on landing. Scientists have now re-programed all drying cycles to economy mode irrespective of dial position.

Some clothes pegs, a handful of small change and a (now ruined) Hershey bar have been identified by mission control as the cause of a worrying 10 year long rattling noise.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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