Two weeks after 35-year-old African-American Oregonian hiker Lance Davis failed to check in at an Appalachian Trail checkpoint on the Tennessee/North Carolina border, Carter County Sheriff’s Department deputies recovered his desiccated remains in the woods near the warm and welcoming Tree House Loft, a gorgeous 1,500 square-foot resort cottage positioned on a leaf-covered hilltop overlooking a majestic tree-filled Cherokee National Forest vista.
Teeming with Park Rangers and emergency rescue trackers, deputies used cadaver dogs to scour more than 1,000 acres of otherwise serene park woodlands, tracking Davis’ trail from his last known checkpoint across the sylvan boscage to the spot of his tragic demise: a newly renovated private getaway nestled in the heart of true mountain luxury!
According to information recovered from Davis’ singed and partially digested journal, which was found discarded in a patch of organic nettles of untouched ripe, juicy, and naturally grown raspberries 20 feet from his mutilated corpse, he was an experienced trekker, having logged nine multi-day back-packing hikes along the A-T in just over a five year period.
Prior to his final desperate scribbles about running for his life from a group of bloodthirsty Trump supporters, he wrote about the countless crystal clear rivers and scenic trails there in the Appalachians, which are freely available to experienced nature enthusiasts and all ages of explorers new to the outdoors.
The pristine tranquility of life off-the-byway is genuinely life-changing, not do be demurred by this incident in which Davis strayed from his route at dusk one evening, surprising a group of grotesque, hairy figures dancing around a campfire shouting “STOP THE STEAL” in discordant and bellowing peals.
Sheriff Clyde Terpinten informed the press that the gang of otherwise run-of-the-mill East Tennesseans apparently chased Davis across the forest for two days straight.
At the newly renovated Tree House Loft, which features a charming off-bedroom west-facing deck with a working jacuzzi, Davis arrived fatigued and dehydrated, according to his journal.
He tried in vain to gain access to the house via the lower basement sliding-glass door, where a working telephone could be plainly seen just inside.
Eventually, surrounded by mouth-frothing men, women, and children shouting “ALL LIVES MATTER,” the hiker probably had less than two minutes to live, per the Sheriff.
Davis certainly missed out on the home’s beautiful interior décor, crafted of antique materials collected from an 1800s North Carolina bank barn, for which exceptional care was taken to add modern comforts to the living spaces while preserving the eclectic character derived from authentic Appalachian craftwork.
On the other side of the home in proximity of the charming and cozy front screened porch was found an ear, a scalp fragment, and two severed fingers that forensic experts confirmed were chewed from the victim while alive.
The peaceful shaded porch is otherwise a true comfort zone where guests can surround themselves with a fresh take on a classic design or simply daydream on the swinging bench while watching the setting sun through the trees.
Davis’ bloody handprints were streaked across the hand-hewn, ornately carved oaken steps, where he was dragged half-conscious through a tastefully maintained sod and rock garden and beaten to death with an authentic 1950’s-era cast iron cauldron, which has undoubtedly seen its fair share of old-fashioned country apple butter, "boilt hot" with copper pennies over a roiling fire, or perhaps it was used for heating the classic Appalachian folk remedy for arthritis, which legendarily consisted of vinegar, honey, and home-made moonshine.
Sheriff Terpinten confirmed that Davis’ head was forcibly removed by two or more of the felons (one of whom was a hungry little rascal with peanut butter all over his hands) and heaved through the cabin's only modern feature, a sunrise-facing picture window just off the cottage’s elegant main room, which offers guests indulging choices and unexpected nuances, not to mention quaint furniture configurations where they can curl up by the fireplace or escape to the loft, where I'm sure Davis would have relished the comfort of the oversized soaking tub, after which he could have enjoyed a bite of mountain cuisine in the dining nook downstairs, followed by a glass of wine by candle light with his special someone on an authentic bear rug.
Davis’ assailants have not been caught, and readers are encouraged to report any suspicious activity to the Sheriff's department, or instead contact Ilex Glade Resorts, Inc.
for information about accommodations for full- or part-time investors in a Cherokee Forest haven of mostly murder-free comfort.
