Investigative Discovery, Melania's favorite channel, was asked to host the tour that Melania wanted to give the nation of what she calls is the "New White House."
"Yes, thank you" started Melania. "The first I noticed upon first looking was how old everything was. Those were the first things I got rid of. The help would be "that's been here since the Jefferson administration" and I'd be like, exactly, about time we replaced it!"
Melania continued, "I got rid of all the old stuff and got everything brand new. Some of the things, like this old bed that was so old they told me Lincoln had slept in it, I would throw out and the next day it would be back! I knew the servants just get attached to this old stuff but you just have to move on. I ended up throwing it out in the trash in the middle of the night."
Some of the stuff in there had little plaques saying stuff like "Monroe used this to sign the Monroe Doctrine blah blah blah. So I got rid of all that boring old stuff first!"
"So feel free to look around. I'm off to New York!" shouted Melania as she ran off to a helicopter.
