Ed Miliband has put himself forward for the job of hosting Top Gear.
In an interview today, Mr. Millipede said. "Am I funny enough? HELL YEAH! Do I know about cars? HELL YEAH! Carburettor. Am I misozni... Am I mimozizni... Am I sexist? HELL YEAH! Bitch. You thought Hammond's crash was bad? Look at the election results.
Mr. Millipede has been at a loose end since his embarrassing and humiliating election defeat. A misjudged attempt at stand-up comedy failed dismally, he didn't turn up at the interview for a beefeater's post and just missed out on a job as a car park attendant. His brother, David now has that job.