A List of The 10 Worst Cat Names In The USA

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 10 February 2014

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Hell Kitty belongs to Mr. and Mrs. Uriah Bazooka of Kalamazoo, Michigan.

CHICAGO - The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency, recently conducted a national survey to determine the worst cat names in the United States.

ADGA Executive Director Bagby B. Buckleybox, who has four cats, stated that over 825,000 individuals participated in the nationwide poll.

Many of the participants submitted foreign cat names, but it was decided that these names would not be used since a lot of people would not know how to pronounce the names or even know what the names meant.

An example of one of the foreign names that was submitted by 137 different people is the name Chan Chan Pu, which is a Bolivian name that means: Feline that sucks the ear wax out of adult female llamas.


  1. Scratchy
  2. Flea Face
  3. Kitty Litter
  4. Fur Freak
  5. Princess Pee
  6. Mr. Claws
  7. Sarah Palin
  8. Fluffy Nuts
  9. Itchy Bitch
  10. Hell Kitty

NOTE: I would like to thank Jenny McCarthy of The View for graciously helping me to compile this list. -BAGBY B. BUCKLEYBOX, The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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