Light & Darkness: Christina Aguilera Interview - "She's back!"

Funny story written by Mig93

Sunday, 5 July 2009


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Light & Darkness: Christina Aguilera Interview - "She's back!"

Light & Darkness, the fourth full-length English studio album by Christina Aguilera, is set to be released sometime this year. We interviewed Xtina on June 22, 2009 and she was very nice; we talked about the new album and other projects.

-Hey Christina! Could you please tell us about your album?
-(laughs) Yeah, hi!

-Hi... So, tell us about your new album.
-Yeah... My new album is called "Alibi & Die" and it is really cool, yeah it is fresh and it's my new album!

-Uhm... But your label has confirmed another title, "Light & Darkness", for the album; was it changed again?
-(sighs) The mother*******! I told them I didn't like that title! Look hon, call it whatever you want, okay? I got no problem. (sighs)

-Okay, now what inspired you to make an album that you call "cool", "fresh" and "different"?
-My new boobs! Max Liron Bratman is the reason I have these precious faces! They did inspire me... Like, I wanted to go for surgery to have a breast augmentation but my pregnancy was just, it just came in time! And that's what the album is about: new hot things you didn't have before and that make you hotter.

-How was it working with DJ Premier?

-DJ Premier.
-Oh yeah, that guy! Uhm... Nothing special... Very average... He couldn't pronounce my family name! He's funny and silly; he inspired me too! (sighs)

-Hehe... And you teamed up with Linda Perry again for this album... How was it teaming up with such a talented person?
-Uhm... Working with Katy Perry was really crazy! I mean she's such a lesbo and I loved that! We just had it, the chemistry and all...

-Uhm... Excuse me?
-What? C'mon!!! Man; I have a busy schedule, make it fast!

-Sia Furler is Australian and you worked with her on this album and you praised her as an artist -
-Hey! Sia's gay- him, please!

-Urgh! Okay, thanks Mrs Aguilera. It was very nice to inter..-
-MISS PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!! What are you? Who are you? What are you doing here!!??!!

On June 25, Miss Aguilera was sent to hospital and rumor is she is deadly ill. Her album will come out under the title "Alibi Then Die" as a tribute in August 2009.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more