Written by Judge Retort

Friday, 17 October 2008

image for Canada votes to re-elect Conservatives
Canadian capital in Ottawa. Only building in Canada with both indoor plumbing and a wet bar, eh.

News flash from the Judge Retort Ottawa bureau: Ok. So, like, in a show of great northern neighborliness, the Canadians have made a beauty offer, eh. No, you should see! Look. They are so magnanimmm, magminomo, magnicartimous,… They are so big-hearted that - this is so beauty, eh! - Canadians are going to re-elect America's conservatives if Obama wins, eh.

The Canadians think it's, like, high time you yanks gave one of your ex-slaves a chance, eh. But because Ronald Reagan was a good friend to the great white north, and came fishing up here a few times, and bought Molsens and even Labatts (but his secret service only drank Okeefe Ale, eh, those hose-heads), we, up here above your 49th parallel, are happy to take away all the conservatives you don't want, eh. So long as they enjoy donuts, eh. The economy is pretty poor up here, too, eh. It's all hosed up. But, at least we had a bumper donut crop this year.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Canada

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