Written by Deanna Goodson

Thursday, 25 March 2004

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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I am incensed. When people begin to question whether Simon Cowell was 'flipping off' a judge or the host of American Idol and not innocently using his middle finger to scratch his temple, what is the world coming to?

Aren't we getting a little hypocritical as a nation? We are the nation that allows Survivor contestants to get naked. We only complained when it was the ugly, fat guy, Richard Hatch. I don 't recall such an outcry when the hot, Jenna Morasca did it for Oreos and Peanut butter, do you? She got a Playboy spread for her trouble (and a million dollars, but since Hatch did too, that just makes my argument weaker and we need to ignore the points that make my position tenuous.)

We are also the nation that shows b*tt*cks on primetime TV, or perhaps people have forgotten a little show called NYPD Blue?

We are also the Nation that uses the word b*tch on television like its an indefinite article these days.

We need to think about our priorities.

***Is it worse to see Janet Jackson's boob than to watch Tony and his "Sopranos" whack a few guys?
***Can a little finger gesture on American Idol be worse than a Survivor contestant calling another contestant a b*tch or an America's Next Top Model contestant doing the same?
***Is it better for our kids to see violence, an unnatural act of humanity, than sex, a more natural act, perhaps one of the most natural acts there is?
***How come no one goes potty on National TV? Why is that more obscene than the rest of this c**p?
***Why am I using asterisks to block out letters you know are there?

Why, indeed? Perhaps we should set up some guidelines for censorship and have them be agreed upon by the American public and not a few prissy and prim people who made us put "Ys" and "Ms" and so forth on our music and television shows and video games.

We, the people, need to speak up and say, "Hey, we are not so easily offended." We are, after all, the nation that gave "Baywatch" its start.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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