Kristen Stewart's Panties On eBay

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Friday, 25 February 2011

image for Kristen Stewart's Panties On eBay

Panties purporting to be Kristen Stewart's are fetching prices of more $3,000 on eBay.

But insiders say the unwary buyers are being conned.

Just last week, an unknown buyer coughed up $3,250 for a pair of "Slightly soiled, worn once, open-crotch panties direct from Kristen Stewart's laundry basket. Certificate of authenticity provided."

But Monty Crotchette, Lingerie Keeper for the Kristen Stewart Wardrobe, insists the trolleys are fakes.

"Listen honey, there ain't no way anyone gets their hands on these garments," he said. "Ms Stewart is very particular.

"Ms Stewart deposits her used panties, brasierres, basques, teddies, babydolls into a designated Ottoman every night. They go straight to laundry the following day and I personally carry out an audit when they come back.

"I can assure you, hun, that nothing is missing.

"Even old, discarded foundation items are sent to the boiler room for incineration.

"So somebody is being conned. Flat. End of."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more