Pattinson poisoned by Kristen's Valentine Dinner

Funny story written by Willow

Monday, 14 February 2011

image for Pattinson poisoned by Kristen's Valentine Dinner

Water for Elephants and Twilight star, Robert Pattinson, was today admitted to hospital with debilitating stomach cramps and vomiting attacks earlier today.

Pattinson was said to have started feeling ill, shortly after eating alleged girlfriend, Kristen Stewarts special valentines dinner par deux.

Ms Stewart, who has been cited as a good cook recently by fellow Twilight cast members, had cooked and served up a special dinner for the pair of them from recipes shown on the Good Food channel.

A source close to Ms Stewart said that the whole incident was related to an event that occurred over the weekend when Pattison had dared to smiled at another woman as they were walking through LAX airport together after having flown back from Baton Rouge.

Pattinson had been lulled into a false sense of security by Kristen , when to his amazement she had laughed off the episode. However, Kristen had been eaten up with jealously and insecurity after the incident and had decided on revenge by lacing the main dish heavily with odourless garlic.

A hospital spokesman said that Pattinson was doing well and would be discharged shortly and had been advised to avoid romantic meals.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more