Ronaldo may be a star "diver" but he sure aint no drunken Hollywood "Disco Queen"!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Monday, 8 November 2010

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image for Ronaldo may be a star "diver" but he sure aint no drunken Hollywood "Disco Queen"!
Ronaldo's Granny making sure he doesn't dive to low and damage his black varnished toenails!

Cristiano Ronaldo has won his libel suit against the Daily Telegraph who claimed that whilst injured and playing for Manchester United, he flew off to Hollwood, went clubbing, spent $10.000 big ones on champagne, four gorgeous models and then was supposedly seen throwing his crutches away whilst dancing like a Hollwood "Disco Queen"!

"None of it is true," claimed Cristiano, "I was sober all night, didn't touch those beauties and certainly didn't do my camp John Travolta turn in public, never!"

Ronaldo did admit to constantly taking the piss out of English referees, being the best "diver" in the business since Jurgen Klinsmann and taking Man Utd for a massive long walk off a Portugese pier.

Also he admitted he hated England, the weather in Manchester and the English tabloids constantly looking for a sign that "Ronny" could be "Gay" (well his black varnished toe nails could have been a hint).

Now he's playing his footie in Madrid, it's warm, he earns millions and he's an adored sporting icon.

The Daily Telegraph can stuff themselves with their accusations, pay him his libel damages so "Ronny" can donate them all to his impoverished Grandma living in Madeira, what a little angel!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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