'Good Girl' Stunned to See Herself Acting Suggestively on YouTube

Funny story written by Olive Pepper

Monday, 30 August 2010


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for 'Good Girl' Stunned to See Herself Acting Suggestively on YouTube
Susan Foster, looking ahead to her future

RINGSIDE, Ky.-A "good girl" who only let herself get out of contol once in her life was mortified to discover that her single act of rebellion was captured on video by someone's phone or other handheld device and posted for everyone to see.

"I-I'm stunned," was all that Susan Foster, the young woman, could say upon seeing herself on YouTube, the popular video sharing site, yesterday. "I think I remember what happened that day, but it's all such a haze. In fact, if it wasn't for this video, I would have had no way of knowing just how wild and crazy I got. Now I have to spend the rest of my life tying to repair the damage and hope against hope that I can redeem my reputation at least somewhat."

Foster, known as "a cute little thing" who never got into any trouble and even helped save a few birds with broken wings when she was younger, had gone to Punta Cana on a whim with some friends from work. Their goal was just to relax and get some sun-something they sorely needed after working overtime every day for two weeks to help meet some important work deadlines-but things quickly got out of control.

"Well, when we got there, it was clear this wasn't going to be an ordinary vacation," says Foster, 24. "At the hotel, the boys were out in full force and they had obviously been drinking for a long time. They took one look at us and could see we were fresh off the plane. They knew we were an easy target."

The boys-six young men who were experienced Punta Cana vacationers-pulled out all the stops to ingratiate themslves with Foster and her two girlfriends. They took them out to dinner, complimented their looks, asked them questions about their jobs, complimented their looks again, and paid for what seemed like an endless flow of alcoholic beverages, starting with margaritas and pina coladas and ending with raspberry flavored martinis. By the time the girls had been there just two days, the line between dream and reality began to blur and before they knew it, they were flinging off their clothes on a rented 24-foot boat and getting down and dirty in a way that makes Foster blush to think about it.

"I guess it was just the intense alcohol consumption, but whatever it was, I just lost any sense of restraint," she says. "Jennifer and I started feeling each other out, lathering each other up in whipped cream, and stuffing each other with Jell-O shooters. If I had any inkling that someone was filming us the whole time, I definitely would have thought twice about what I was doing, especially the orgy part, not to mention the whole thing with that one guy on the canopy of the boat. That was just weird because at the time the boat was docked and we were surrounded by what must have been 300 people. It must have been good, though, because people were applauding afterward. Still, it's not something I wanted video taped."

Foster says she's thinking about suing someone, although she's not sure who. She's sure the young men used phony names, and in any case she can't remember any of them. She's definitely going to contact YouTube to try to get the identity of the person who posted the video. She knows it'll be a nightmare, because she'll have to go through all these layers of management. She'll have to get a lawyer, obviously, and that's expensive, and in a way, the damage has already been done.

Right now, though, she's doing nothing, because she's still processing what happened. "Twenty-four years of almost perfect living," she says. "I lose control one time and now look at where I am. I'm just thankful I at least looked good doing it, and thanks to YouTube's excellent standards, which doesn't allow full-fledged nudity, you don't actually see all of these outrageous acts, but there's a lot of suggesting going on here. I can tell you, if I were a young man, I'd be all over this video."

By all accounts, young men are indeed all over the video. It has been viewed more than a million times, even though it's only been up for four days.

Foster says she's working out a fallback plan if she can't repair her reputation enough to succeed in the work world. "I'll have to become sort of a sexpot who does ths kind of stuff as her thing," she says. "I mean, what other choice do I have? I'll just have to embrace this lifestyle now. Otherwise, I'll spend my life fighting a losing battle to repair my reputation. By embracing the lifestyle, I can get on with my life. Of course, it won't be the life I had planned, but at least it'll be a life. Plus, I get some satisfaction in knowing young men think I'm hot. All I wanted to be known as was "good," but I guess if I have to be known as "hot," well, at least that's somethng."

For Foster, the fight for her reputation is indeed just beginning. Reports now indicate that the nude portions of her escapades are appearing on other, less restrictive video sharing sites, and the audience numbers are quickly ratcheting up. Foster will no doubt breathe a sigh of resignation upon learning of this development.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more