One of Britney Spears' top bodyguards has quit after accusing her of sexual harassment.
29-year-old Fernando Flores has claimed that Britney paraded naked in front of him, runs around the house naked and even tried to entice him into her bedroom, "Nobody should have to put up with that" said the bodyguard.
When the story broke it left the music industry and Britney fans alike absolutely stunned and in "deep shock" as one fan summed up the whole story in three words, "Attention, seeking weirdo". He went on to add, "She runs around naked and offers it to him on a plate and then he gets paid for it, what's he complaining about, he's obviously a f**king weirdo" and everyone was said to agree.
The disturbed bodyguard reported the incident to the police, where at first they thought it was a "joke" but their opinions quickly changed when Flores produced proof of the incidents, "When we realised he was telling the truth, we all drew our guns immediately as we knew something was seriously wrong with him" explained Sheriff Raymond, "Then Flores ran out of the building, we did not pursue as we feared for our lives, we're not trained to deal with someone that crazy".
This has sparked a national manhunt for the bodyguard, the biggest one of its kind as he now sits at the very top of the FBI's most wanted list, "We can't let a man in his mental condition walk the streets, he needs to be caught ASAP, he is obviously not thinking straight and a very sick man" said a spokesman for the FBI.
Security in the US has been bumped up as a response to Flores being at large, with the national guard on standby, road blocks in major cities and even Jack Bauer has been called in to protect the president, "Until this madman is caught, no one is safe, there's no telling what a man in his mental condition is capable of".
One good thing to come out of all this is the fact there is now a vacancy amongst Britney Spears bodyguards, application forms for the job are being auctioned off on E-bay.
