Abe Vigoda Sues All Four Networks After They Keep Listing Him Among Dead

Funny story written by Bureau

Sunday, 21 March 2010

image for Abe Vigoda Sues All Four Networks After They Keep Listing Him Among Dead
"Really, I'm Not Dead Yet!"

Abe Vigoda who starred in television's Barney Miller and several movies, including The Godfather, is suing ABC, CBS, NBC and FOX as they once again listed him with the stars who had died in 2009 during their last Evening News Report on December 31st.

"This is the fifth year in a row and I'm mad as a hornet's nest. I don't know if it's a rumor or my photos or what, BUT I AM NOT DEAD!"

"Just my luck, when I do die, they'll leave me off."

Vigoda even had his own show, 'FISH' during 1977-78 as a spinoff from Barney Miller.

"Maybe they get me mixed up with Jack Soo who died while we were doing the Miller show. He'd be tickled to death to know they were calling me dead at the end of every year."

Vigoda even did a Super Bowl commercial this past February...a month ago.

"Yeah, me and Betty White. They listed her as dead too until she came in and held the News producer by the balls until they erased it and put down Bea Arthur."

"That gives me an idea for the end of this year..... unless of course, I'm dead by then. No, now I got something to look forward to."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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