HOLLYWOOD - The Hollywood Police Department has just announced that they have two individuals in custody who were allegedly plotting to kidnap American Idol judge Simon Cowell.
The HPD was reportedly tipped off by a former janitor who was employed by The Kodak Moment Theater where the American Idol Hollywood Week performances have been taking place.
Hollywood police identified the janitor simply as Juanito, who recently had quit his job due to as he put it the 'gigantic amount of tears dat dee losers were shedding all obur dee place.'
Juanito, who is originally from Costa Rica, was asked what his last name was. He grinned like the Catalina Island cat that swallowed the Costa Rican canary and replied, "Let's just say dat my last name ease Limbaugh."
Simon Shindlebocker, the producer of American Idol, was asked by the entertainment media who exactly was involved in the kidnapping plot.
At first Shindlebocker stated that he was not at liberty to divulge that information but when he was informed that both Larry King and The National Enquirer were going to release the names he decided to go ahead so that he could scoop both Larry King and The National Enquirer.
Shindlebocker did stress to the media that he was only going to give out their names and nothing more. He reached in his shirt pocket and took out a small spiral notepad. He flipped the pages and said that the name of the first alleged kidnapper was Chace Zidlicky, who goes by the nickname of "Zippity."
He then stated that the second alleged kidnapper was named Repunsel Gooberhoop and he added that was all he was going to say about them.
One of the reporters shouted out, "Mr. Shindlebocker, how old are the two detainees?"
"Zidlicky is 24, and Gooberhoop is 21."
"Are they from the L.A. area?"
"Ah no. Zidlicky is an unemployed parking lot attendant who used to work for The OK Car Corral Parking Lot in Sandwich, Illinois and Gooberhoop resides in Burnt Factory, West Virgina."
Shindlebocker was asked what Gooberhoop's profession was. He replied that she was an unemployed McDonald's drive-thru window attendant.
"Any priors?" He was asked.
"Let me see," he said flipping through his notepad. "Yes, Zidlicky was convicted in 2008, of holding up the First Sandwich International Bank and making off with $852,991. I believe that only about $38 or so was ever recovered.
Mr. Zidlicky served three years in The Abraham Lincoln State Prison. Shindlebocker then noted that Gooberhoop had been convicted in 2008, of kidnapping the assistant manager at the McDonald's where she worked.
He noted that she was released after only serving three weeks on a technicality. When asked for the technicality. Shindlebocker shook his head and replied that it was due to the fact that Vonda Whistlebridge, the assistant manager, who had testified against Gooberhoop, was arrested about three weeks after testifying against her with over 80 stolen Big Macs in her possession.
So as of now both Zidlicky and Gooberhoop remain in The Los Angeles County Jail in lieu of bail which was set at $1.5 million for Zidlicky and $18,000 for Gooberhoop.
To learn more about the Zidlicky-Gooberhoop case go to www.effedupamericanidolrejects.dot
