HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Lindsay Lohan has recently had more ups and downs than an amusement park roller coaster. She has survived the harsh breakup of the love of her life Samantha Ronson.
She has accepted the fact that no movie studio wants her to star in one of their movies, and she has realized that she has to get her act together before the final curtain falls and her three act play closes for good.
LiLo, as she is known, has finally understood the difference between being a celebrity and being a celebrity. And it was not an easy distinction for La Lohan to make.
She has just recently learned that she does in fact prefer the Oscar Meyer Wiener to the Dunkin' Donut. And it is a good thing because Lindsay is built to accept the OMW and not constructed to have her DD rubbed by another DD.
And with Lindsay realizing this, she has opted to go in and have a vaginoplasty procedure. Although her insurance will not pay for it, because it falls under cosmetic surgery, LiLo does not care because she still has some money left over from her salary from the movie Confessions of A Teenage Drama Queen.
Like she told her new BFF Paris Hilton. What the heck do you get when one DD rubs up against another DD? LiLo answered her own question by saying "Just a bunch of misplaced sugar."
So for now, Wednesday, January 27, 2010, at 10:40 p.m. Lindsay Lohan is only batting from one side of the plate. And if everything goes as LiLo hopes it goes, she will finally come to accept the fact that the hot dog will become the only item on her sexually appetited menu.
In news from Louisiana. Official reports are stating that during Hurricane Katrina there were six babies born who were given the name Katrina. Four babies were named Windy, and one was named Blowsie.