Friday, 10 July 2009


The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Woman With World's Largest Vagina to Speak at Oscar Mayer Funeral
Woman with world's largest vagina has been swallowing Oscar Mayer's meat since her youth.

MADISON, WI - The woman with the world's largest vagina has cancelled several performances of her wildly successful "World's Largest Vagina Monologues" to honor her dearly departed friend, Oscar G. Mayer.

Mayer is perhaps known best for being able to make his meat last far longer than Viagrin ever could.

Not only was Mayer the third in a long line of Oscar Mayer's whose bologna she swallowed, she said, he also gave her "my first taste" of showbiz.

"Back in the 70's," she explained, "when I was just a little girl with the world's little, itty, bitty, bittiest vagina, Mr. Mayer hired me to sing in one of his commercials. He was a really nice man."

The woman with the world's largest vagina said she has always been happy to ingest whatever Oscar Mayer produces, especially when it comes to a weiner, the way it's "so warm, so firm and plump, dripping with sweet, sticky juices," and the way they "fill up your buns so nicely."

She also admitted she didn't mind cramming his bologna into her face either, even back then, usually several times a week, and sometimes two or three times a day.

She said she still does, and will probably continue to do so despite the fact that he is now deceased.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more