Jackson concerts now till 2018

Funny story written by NODDY

Saturday, 21 March 2009

image for Jackson concerts now till 2018
Jacko - without the mask

Michael Jackson has added another 300 concerts to his "This is It" 2009 UK tour, to take the total number to 2,900 nights lasting until October 2018.

It is estimated that Jackson will be seen by 58 million people on this tour, almost the complete population of Great Britain. He will be 59 years old when the tour ends, and over £4billion richer.

"The King of Pop", as Jackson is known, has broken all records with this tour, and exceeded the expectations of everyone involved; there was doubt when the tour was first announced that he would struggle to fill the O2 for twenty nights.

Tickets are still selling on eBay for thousands of pounds, and fans are travelling from all over the world to see the shows.

Here are some things you may not know about Jackson and the "This is It" tour:

  1. If all the spaghetti eaten by Jackson and crew were put end-to end it would go twice round the moon.
  2. All Michael's glitter gloves are handmade by Snobson's of St.James, who have made calf gloves for HRH Prince Charles for 40 years.
  3. If all the money Jacko is earning for this tour was laid on a football field in $1 bills, it would cover the grass to a depth of 3".
  4. Jackson's CD sales would fill 4 London Buses 3 times over, higher than Nelson's Column.
  5. The Whacko One insists on having 4 boiled eggs for breakfast, all of different consistency, so one is "just right".
  6. The "Thriller" video was the most expensive ever at the time, and Jackson wears out 4 pairs of shoes "moonwalking" per week.

    (Is this enough made-up statistics, ed?)
    (NO-ed)

  7. If all the CDs sold by Jackson worldwide were laid end-to-end and the height of a London Bus, they would come to the furtherst distance ever jumped by Evel Knievel (186 feet).
  8. (Sorry, ed, can't be bothered any more)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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