Jade Goody News: More famous than Michael Jackson

Written by VicticiousWhips

Wednesday, 18 March 2009

Super star Jade Goody has nearly topped the charts of the "Top 5 Most Famous People in the World" in a recent survey.

Jade Goody, who shot to fame after declaring that a football was bigger than the sun, lays quietly in her home waiting for the inevitable. People all over the world have sent positive messages of hope even though they have no real clue who the messages are for.

In a recent survey, taken in 26 random worldwide countries, 1000 people were stopped during their daily duties and asked to name the Top 5 Most Famous People in the World today.

The results came in as follows:

  1. Arnold Schwarzenegger 43%
  2. Jade Goody 31%
  3. Angelina Jolie 19%
  4. Bruce Lee 3%
  5. Michael Jackson 2%

However, when asked who exactly is Jade Goody, the answers ranged from the bizarre to the extraordinary.

One man from Mexico said, "Jade Goody sounds like an awesome stone found in a pic 'n' mix bag".

A young woman in Japan commented on how happy she was to hear that name but could not explain why, "It is with great pleasure to have my ear drums being pounded by the name of Jade Goody, I sense a great positive vibe and will gladly share it with my fellow neighbours!" ... "I have no idea what Jade Goody is, please stop asking me".

A man in Scotland reacted to the question by answering it with a question, "You said Jade Goody? Why you stupid ******* idiot... burp...I will rip you apart.... burp..". He later promptly set his kilt on fire and declared it National Non-Kilt Day.

It has taken about 9 years for the survey to be completed but DNA tests are being currently being carried out for authenticity reasons.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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