Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 24 July 2008

image for David Tennant Mobbed At Stratford Hamlet
To die, to sleep; to sleep, perchance to get some kip

David Tennant, the Doctor Who actor, was given a rousing reception and mobbed by fans yesterday at the Courtyard Theatre in Stratford, where he is appearing in the RSC production of Shakespeare's Hamlet.

The Timelord struggled to enter the theatre when he first arrived, and had to be admitted by security staff who bade him:

"Come at once, Sire, thine way ist not long blocked!"

Tennant, playing the Prince of Denmark as a true professional, replied in kind, saying:

"I thank thee kindly, lad, forsooth that angry rabble dost incur the greatest wrath in me. Lead on with haste, and take me whither I may dump my bags, for I am an artisan of the highest note."

As the security guard, called Rob, led him away, Tennant called over his shoulder:

"Seldom twixt thither and hither hath mine eyes fallen upon such an assorted bundle of lechers and misfits. Begone, lest I unleash the passion of a clench-ed fist upon thine craven spirits. Tossers!"

Out of earshot of the autograph hunters, he leaned closer to his escorts and asked:

"You didn't see me drop my Sonic Screwdriver, did you?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
30 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more