Paris Hilton Is Escapee From Witch Mountain

Written by Jalapenoman

Monday, 21 July 2008

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Paris Hilton Is Escapee From Witch Mountain
Is she a good witch or a bad witch?

Paranormal researchers have discovered that Hollywood Socialites Paris and Nicky Hilton are actually twins who escaped from Witch Mountain (a story first fictionalized in the 70's movies Escape From Witch Mountain and Return to Witch Mounain).

Paris and Nicky are the nieces of Kim Richards, star of the first movie (who actually played herself). Kim's sister is Kathy Richards Hilton, mother of the aforementioned Paris and Nicky.

When told of the discovery and asked if she had any psychic powers, Paris said that "I've always been able to make men's penises stand on end. Men also tend to obey my every desire; I can make any one of them want to sleep with me and buy me liquor."

When asked if she was going to play a part in the upcoming movie, Race to Witch Mountain, Paris replied that "I don't like races. It's just cars driving in circles and a bunch of smelly exhaust."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more