Cote d'Azur, France - (Starstruck Mess): LA astrologers are jubilant that trout-pout movie actress Angelina Jolie farrowed according to plan on Saturday 12 July just as the planet of glamor, sycophancy and megabux attention seeking was entering the sign of Leo.
Months of earnest cajoling paid off handsomely as psychic surgeons performed a C-Section in alignment with celestial farces (sic) beneficial to the Hollywood couple's desire to rake in $$$s from the event.
The birth of Nux Vomica and sister Vivienne Marshall Petain was soon followed by a whopping great big picture rights check from tawdry Californian gossip-peddler LAFagHagSlagMag.
Its Bel Air-based editor Dave Skank said today:
"Yeah, the $11 million copyright deal means Brangelina's favorite self-promotion charity will ease the pain of the next years' plastic surgery bills."
Re-inventing the daftass couple as 'iconic superstars and
high-profile humanitarians' has so far cost the Hollywood disinformation commission over $100 million in legal fees, backhanders, bribes and donations to CIA favorite causes.
Jennifer Aniston is one hot ass.
