Winton - Shock revelation

Funny story written by Norton Folgate

Friday, 2 May 2008

image for Winton - Shock revelation
Winton (back), Iraq, 1991

TV favourite Dale Winton has confessed to a past that will shock his fans when he revealed that he was in fact a member of the 21 SAS regiment making numerous tours of Northern Ireland and was involved in the Iraq war of 1991.

Known as 'Chisel' he was well liked and a consummate professional and great for morale. Before going on missions would shout 'In it to win it' which is how the BBC came up with the name for the popular lottery based quiz which airs on Saturday evenings.

Winton was part of the SAS team which stormed the Iranian embassy (pictured) in 1980. One former colleague said, 'Winton was a consummate professional, a bit of a mad b*stard with a penchant for fake tan but he said this was for camouflage purposes.'

Winton was unavailable for comment this week as he was holidaying with Scouse TV favourite and friend, Cilla Black at the exclusive Sandy Lane resort, Barbados.

He was spotted lighting a cigarette by rubbing two sticks together with a bit of kindling as he made a temporary shelter made from palm trees.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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