Dora the Explorer Completes Journey

Written by Warren Redlich

Tuesday, 25 March 2008

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Dora the Explorer does the 12-step program

Dora the Explorer, the animated children's television star, completed a difficult journey recently. Like many young celebrities, Dora had fallen into some bad behavior with alcohol a major factor. An affair with Clay Aiken and a foray into adult entertainment have been covered by this newspaper.

In an effort to rehabilitate herself, Dora set out on a symbolic journey - to her grandmother's house (or casa de su abuela, in Spanish). To get there, first she had to cross a river in Egypt known as Denial. As usual for Dora the Explorer episodes, the river was filled with crocodiles who made a path across and closed their mouths upon hearing the word "cierra."

Next, she went through the hot, sweaty jungle. A spokesman indicated that this symbolized the suffering of going alcohol-free.

Finally, Dora had to rescue the princess (her true self) by reassembling the dozen stairs to the room where she was trapped in the castle by the evil witch. This 12-step program was the most difficult phase. After completing it, however, the princess trapped the evil witch (alcohol) in a magic bottle.

Dora's friend Boots suggested that she should release the witch if she promised to be nice - a typical outcome in the show. Dora, hardened by her traumatic experience, knew better. She locked the bottle in a cellar and threw away the key, and shouted "We Did It! Lo Hicimos!"

Now refreshed, Dora the Explorer is planning on a great new season for entertaining children all over the world. In this year's first episode, Dora will go to Acapulco to see its famous golden plant. Later in the season she'll visit Colombia to discover a special magic white powder.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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