Brangelina have a lover's spat; meanwhile, a bridge collapses in China and an earthquake hits Peru, killing hundreds

Funny story written by Robert W. Armijo

Friday, 17 August 2007


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The better half of Brangelina waits for Brad to clean up his act and get behind John Edwards

Hollywood, California - A battle royal took place between the two most lucky, talented and beautiful people on earth since Adam and Eve when Brangelina briefly showed signs of actual individuality this week. The argument, political in nature, unfortunately occurred in the same week a bridge collapsed in China and an 8.0-magnitude earthquake hit Peru, killing hundreds, and leaving hundreds of thousands more, homeless, momentarily drawing attention away from the couple.

It all happened while the couple was having a candle lit dinner, each looking more beautiful than anything in nature should be allowed. Their customary unspoken interlude was suddenly broken by the unfamiliar tone of an actual conversation of one of the two most divisive topics ever discovered by mankind: politics and religion.

To their mutual shock and wonderment, they discovered the other supports a different political candidate in the up coming 2008 Presidential election.

The moment became so heated it resulted in Angelina throwing a glass of red wine into Brad's face; after which Brad stormed off.

Brad, the other good-looking one, had declared his support for Barack Obama, while Angelina declared she supports John Edwards, despite being a White guy.

Angelina, the other good-looking one, too, argued that if her multiple international racial adoptions have taught her anything it's that no one should vote for their political candidate of their choice simply because they happen to have suffered the misfortune of being born White.

Meanwhile, Brad maintains his fantastic physique well into his 40's, leaving the world in utter amazement.

The couple has single handily brought back into fashion the old limousine liberal once believed to be extinct in the American political scenery and taking it international with their celebrity crusade against anything they want, say political scientists.

Nations that are not even White, or that remotely have a White minority population, are reporting their first instances of White liberal guilt, resulting in the adoption of their own impoverished non-White children, while at least the ones Madonna has not already adopted.

"It's the old limousine liberal effect," said a spokesperson at the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard. "We haven't seen this since the early to mid 1960s or on this wide of a scale. It kind of makes me what to stop barrowing to get something like a Republican and start taxing again to pay for it like a Democrat."

Meanwhile, world leaders are positioning themselves for unprecedented global cessation of hostilities and the first real opportunity for world peace.

Experts believe it is in anticipation of the couple's reunion as they are poised to have the best makeup sex ever experienced since it was invented.

The world waits with baited breath to join the couple for one global collective orgasmic sigh of relief as they once again unite to become Brangelina.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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