John Smeaton: A New Hero - Lindsay Lohan the Prize?

Funny story written by Warren Redlich

Saturday, 7 July 2007

image for John Smeaton: A New Hero - Lindsay Lohan the Prize?
John Smeaton staring at Lindsay Lohan

The War on Terror has a new hero, and his name is John Smeaton. Smeaton catapulted himself to international status with one swift kick in late June.

An worker at the Glasgow Airport in Scotland, Smeaton saw a terrorist fighting with a police officer, and took matters into his own hands ... well ... feet anyway. He ran over to the scene and kicked the terrorist.

Since the incident occurred, the Scotsman has been embraced by his countrymen and others worldwide. As his drinking habits were already something of a local legend, websites have been set up for various related purposes, such as to raise money so that Smeaton never has to buy another drink.

One enterprising web developer has even set up a social networking site for women to solicit dates with the brave kicker: While Smeaton has not embraced the site, he was pleased when he heard that Lindsay Lohan had set up a page. "Her name sounds Scottish, and she's quite a looker," said Smeaton, "but I don't know if she can keep up with me in the pubs, and she'd have to keep her dad away from me or I might kick him a few times."

The incident has also sparked interest in Hollywood, with Brad Pitt optioning the story for a possible movie. Lindsay Lohan is reportedly interested in portraying herself in the film.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more