MEMPHIS, TENNER-SEA (Defecated News) - In a website press release last night, pop king Michael Jackson announced that he will be selling of parts of the King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley.
Jackson bought the rights to Elvis in the 90s when he tricked Lisa Marie into signing papers while they were pretending to have sex. He now owns anything to do with the King including the dead man's bones.
"Due to financial problems, I have been put in a situation where I must now sell the King. I invite fans and collectors to click onto eBay and buy parts. All were preserved in vinegar.", read Jackson's statement.
It is expected that the Presley family will attempt to block the sale with the help of their lawyers. Priscilla Presley responded to Jackson in a web-statement of her own;
"He was the King to everyone and everyone wanted a bit of him. But not literally. When they said they felt Elvis inside them, it was not literal. When fans say they want the King back, this is not what they are meaning. I urge Jackson to rethink his plans."
There are up to 100 body parts up for auction in total.
