Harry Potter was originally porn fiction

Written by Noshing Mink

Monday, 13 August 2007

image for Harry Potter was originally porn fiction
Harry Potter Teen Transvestite

J.K. Rowling has admitted that the Harry Potter books were originally meant to be porno books for adults.

In the first book, "Harry Potter and the Philosopher get Stoned", teenage transvestite Potter smoked a lot of dope which he bought from a disreputable character called Snape.

The second book, "Harry Potter's Chamber of Secrets", was about Potter's sexual adventures with Snape and a dwarf-like character called Dobbie who hides inside Potter's rear orifice.

In the third book of the original trilogy, "Harry Potter and the Prisoner's Ass in the Can", Potter gets arrested for his deviant behaviour and is put in prison where he becomes Sirius Black (the prison tough guy)'s "boy bitch".

Rowling confessed that she had doubts about the original theme. Rather than re-write the books from scratch, she altered some of the characters and plots, and made them into the children's stories they are now.

"Who would have guessed", she laughed, "that Ron Weasely was originally a rent boy! Or that Minister Fudge was originally a gay priest called Minister Fuck? Or that the Knight Bus was originally a mobile brothel. Or exactly how Moaning Myrtle really got her name. Or that Nymphadora Tonks was originally Nymphomaniac Tonks. Or that Hermione Granger was originally a hooker called Herpes Granger. Or that Igor Karkaroff was originally Igor Jerkoff. Indeed, Hagrid was originally a towering sexual giant called Shag-rid!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more