Charlie Sheen Denies Sperm Donor Request From Denise Richards

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Sunday, 12 August 2007

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image for Charlie Sheen Denies Sperm Donor Request From Denise Richards
Richards wants to be pregnant with another of Sheen's children

Actress Denise Richards requested a sperm donation from soon to be ex-husband Charlie Sheen. They already have two children together and she wanted the third to have the same DNA. Sheen, star of "Two and a Half Men" and the "Hot Shots" movies, laughed at her request and reminded reporters of their current messy divorce.

"If she wants a sperm donation, the only way she's ever going to get it is the old fashioned way," said Sheen on the set of his television show. Other comments were not printable by this publication.

Richards, upset at the news and her estranged husband's comments, promptly contacted her attorney. Lawyers for Denise have now added Sheen's penis, testicles, and sperm to their list of desired items in the divorce settlement. "If Charlie is going to act this way," said Richards, "then I'm going to fix it so he can't be a dick about things any more."

"...and, when I get his manhood, I'm going to have a baby every year and keep suing him for child support and custody for each one. He can have a hit comedy show, but now he'll be the half a man on it."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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