Los Angeles Airport, August 11, 2037 -- Jackie Chan, one of the stars of the Rush Hour movie franchise (including the just-released Rush Hour 34) was accused of smuggling and held at LAX last night.
A search of his green plaid luggage had revealed an emaciated black man who said his name was Chris Tucker. The pair, exhausted and in poor physical condition, claimed that they had been kidnapped in 1998 by director Brett Ratner and forced to make Rush Hour movies for the past 39 years. Low on funds, they decided to pool their resources and were able to scrounge up enough cash for a one-way ticket to Hong Kong, the site of Rush Hour 35, which will begin shooting next week.
Onlookers to the arrest were milling around, gossiping about the sad decline of Chan and Tucker, heralded as superstars at the time of the first Rush Hour film. Chan got disgusted and suddenly opened the white plastic bag he had been holding, releasing its contents - an aggressively hissing little monkey - into the crowd. "Now you see real Rush Hour," Chan assured a laughing Tucker, as they cheerfully watched the frightened gawkers making a quick getaway.
