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Monkey Dust Hits Stoke School in Daytrip Disaster

Funny story: Monkey Dust Hits Stoke School in Daytrip Disaster

Pupils at a local Stoke-on-Trent High School were looking forward to a long-arranged day trip to a popular animal centre today, but disaster struck soon after they arrived. The schoolchildren, aged 11 to 16, were visiting the local "Monkey Forest...

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Chimpanzee Star Of 1996 Film “Ed” Accused Of Sexual Harassment

Funny story: Chimpanzee Star Of 1996 Film “Ed” Accused Of Sexual Harassment

A female crew member and a male actor from the 1996 smash hit film “Ed” have come forward to accuse the film’s primate star of sexual harassment. The events, first reported by TMZ and the Huffington Post, allegedly occurred during the film’s produ...

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Chimpanzee Plastic Surgeon Team Killed While Performing Face Lift

Funny story: Chimpanzee Plastic Surgeon Team Killed While Performing Face Lift

BILLINGSGATE POST: How can anyone forget the story about the couple who were viciously attacked by two chimps while innocently eating cake with their son Moe, celebrating his 39th birthday. Moe, who was an iconoclast by nature, shared living quarter...

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William Shakespeare Monkey Experiment Latest

Funny story: William Shakespeare Monkey Experiment Latest

A experiment to investigate whether an infinite number of monkeys sat at an infinite number of typewriters would, if left alone, eventually come up with the complete works of William Shakespeare may be in its final stages. The experiment, set up 4...

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Shelf Thee Selfie Monkey

Funny story: Shelf Thee Selfie Monkey

The U.S. federal court system has been attempting to declare, Naruto, a crested macaque monkey, to be the rightful owner of his famous "monkey selfie." This has been a two year court case between PETA bread, David the photographer, and a self-publish...

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Monkeys are to be employed as parental guidance officers in India!

Funny story: Monkeys are to be employed as parental guidance officers in India!

The Indian government have decided to introduce new legislation pertaining to bringing up children by employing monkeys in nurseries, nationwide. After discovering a young girl who was raised by primates in the Uttar Pradesh jungle, a la Mowgli wi...

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Gibraltar monkeys refuse to leave rock after Brexit shock!

Funny story: Gibraltar monkeys refuse to leave rock after Brexit shock!

Monkeys inhabiting the Rock of Gibraltar have come out in solidarity with non-Brexiters by refusing to leave their warm, Mediterranean adopted homeland after Brexit is completed in 2019! They are refusing to leave Europe and certainly do not want to...

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If you cannot get the real Kim get his brother Kim!

Funny story: If you cannot get the real Kim get his brother Kim!

The world is in deep mourning after a young Indonesian lady was paid a couple of measly $ Bucks to top a Kim; however having removed Kim Mark II is small consolation because the world needs Mark 1 removed not Mark II. However, there is an ancient...

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The Chimp's On You

Funny story: The Chimp's On You

A rare hairless chimp called "Chimp Chop" has died unexpectedly his keepers say. He was unexpectedly hit by a bus after unexpectedly fleeing from his enclosure and out onto a busy road. The bus driver was unnerved by the unexpected appearance...

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New Government Study Shows Old Government Study was a Waste of Money

Funny story: New Government Study Shows Old Government Study was a Waste of Money

A recent government study just concluded that the previous government study was a complete waste of money. Government scientists previously conducted a study on the gambling habits of monkeys, to see if the monkeys copied other monkeys betting habits...

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Monkeys Protest Being Portrayed as Tedd Cruz's Children

Funny story: Monkeys Protest Being Portrayed as Tedd Cruz's Children

Monkeys are irate after a distasteful political cartoon depicted them stumping for the dark horse Republican presidential candidate. "Sure we work for peanuts sometimes," one inconsolable primate protested, "but that doesn't mean we'll go out in f...

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Chimps Sue Planet of the Apes Makers

Funny story: Chimps Sue Planet of the Apes Makers

Chimps are filing lawsuits against the Planet Of the Apes makers citing unfair portrayals in the film. One of the chimps signed furiously to his human counsel citing that the makers artistic license has been taken too far and these are not real ch...

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Bavarian Bestiality Believed to Be Behind Belgian Boys' Buggery

Funny story: Bavarian Bestiality Believed to Be Behind Belgian Boys' Buggery

Munich, Deutschland - Dr. Hans Freid Eggs, a renowned German zoologist has come to the defence of four orang-utans convicted of grievous buggery committed against a group of Belgian schoolboys. "This is nothing but a snitch-up!"(sic) exclaimed Egg...

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F.B.I Remove Magazines From Donor Clinics - Swoop and Droop Three Year Sting "Operation Centrefold"

Funny story: F.B.I Remove Magazines From Donor Clinics - Swoop and Droop Three Year Sting "Operation Centrefold"

The ultra Feminist head of the FBI, Ms. Gona Dectomy has announced the success of a three year Honey Trap. "Operation Sticky Centrefold". Twenty thousand men were interviewed and forty thousand "helpful" Lads Magazines were last night being examined...

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PETA Wants To Meet With The Ringling Brothers Barnum & Bailey Circus

Funny story: PETA Wants To Meet With The Ringling Brothers Barnum & Bailey Circus

NORFOLK, Virginia - The executive director with PETA, Mimosa Ledbetter, recently stated on The Ellen DeGeneres Show that her group would like to have a nice friendly meeting with the representatives of the world's biggest circus, The Ringling Brother...

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Zoo Keeper Caught Spanking The Monkey

OMAHA, NE - A zookeeper in Omaha, NE was recently placed on indefinite work suspension due to disciplinary measures he was caught taking with primate residents at a local zoo. "I felt that bobo, in particular, was being selfish, hoarding food, and...

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Chimp Wins Art Contest, Hires Lawyer

Funny story: Chimp Wins Art Contest, Hires Lawyer

No sooner was it announced that Brent, a 37-year-old Louisiana chimp, had won first prize in a chimpanzee art contest (read about it here on TheGuardian.com website) than the chimp called a lawyer to complain that the sanctuary where he lived would b...

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Travis Goes Bananas!!!

Funny story: Travis Goes Bananas!!!

OK, I have a confession to make: I think I'm a bad person. Not "Battlefield Earth" bad, but bad enough. What has driven me to all this self-flagellation? What could cause such dark introspection and self recrimination? The answer is simple - a crazy chimpanzee. I still can't stop thinking about the former celebrity chimpanzee who went nuts. How could a story about a former celebrity chimp wh...

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Trump's Brown People

Trump warns that the brown people are coming. That’s not as bad as the orange person.
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