Written by queen mudder

Sunday, 3 June 2007

image for Bookies offer 4/6 odds on Paris Hilton prison no-show
Will she or won't she?

Los Angeles - (Ass Mess): Internet spread betting index Aintgottaprayer.com is offering odds of 6/4ON that peroxide socialite Paris Hilton will fail to show up at Lynwood jail on Tuesday 5 June on some pretext or other.

5/4ON is being offered on a 'medical emergency' such as accidental suicide bid, pill overdose, inflammatory scalp-related hair extension syndrome etc.

And even money is available that the panty-allergy bimbo will claim a sudden nervous breakdown necessitating immediate hospitalisation at the most luxurious Beverly Hills facility her medical cover can buy.

Other odds on offer include 5/4 against Hilton being diagnosed with some acute psychiatric condition which her lawyers will then argue in an emergency court appeal 'would result in her physical, mental and emotional life being seriously damaged by any incarceration'.

As the clock ticks relentlessly on towards Paris's witching hour an estimated $100 million has already been wagered on whether she will turn up voluntarily or in handcuffs.

"That's more money than the bookies lost in the entrie Epsom Derby betting fiasco," an industry spokesman said today.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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