Written by queen mudder

Saturday, 2 June 2007

image for Katie Holmes: I'm Ready for More Kidding the Public
More kids and more pounds around the old hips for Holmes? "Sure, why ever not?"

Hollywood - (Ass Mess): Speaking from the studio set of her next movie 'Made Money' actress Katie Holmes has told reporters she is ready to publicise the next plotlines about her marriage just in time to up the ante on her pre-nupt with movie star husband Tom Cruise.

"Sure, we're having such fun, it's so amazing," Holmes, 28, said of the year she, Cruise and Cruise's elderly, incontinent mother Mary Mapother had spent living together in Beverly Hills.

"Every day's been a Revelation, just like the Bible said!

"More kids with Tom? Well, why ever not. Can't think of anything I'd rather be doing, other than making $$$$$$s as a movie star, getting nominated for an Academy Award, winning an Acedemy Award, losing another 10lb off my ass...."

Holmes is mother to the couple's 13 month old daughter Suri and a full time step-Mom to her husband's two adopted teenage kids.

"Life's an absolute peach. The kids are so sweet, my senile, delusional and totally paranoid mother-in-law's an absolute angel and my matrimonial lawyer just kicks ass!" Holmes said after seeking advice on the legal agreements she entered into before tying the knot with 44 year old Cruise.

"We have so many kids in our house...some of them a lot older than others, sure...

"I never thought my life would change so much in such a short time."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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