Kissimmee, Florida Outlaws Butt Calls

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 22 December 2022

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The Kissimmee town council notes 16-year-old Tammy Tellavini, made 41 butt calls in just 3 days.

KISSIMMEE, Florida - (Satire News) - The Cloud 9 News Agency says that the Kissimmee, Florida town council has voted to fine any citizen who makes a butt call, accidentally or on purpose.

Councilwoman Sybilla Cullenshick, 53, told reporter Lexi Aspen, that lots of the younger citizens, some who are up at all hours of the day and night, are notorious for making butt calls.

She noted that a study that was conducted by The QuinniPinni Polling Agency found that 98.3% of all Kissimmee butt calls were from individuals between the ages of 6 and 16.

Mrs. Cullenshick, who recently divorced her husband of 35 years, said that the vote to fine butt call makers was unanimous (10-0).

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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