HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – Cinderella St. Lamb, with the Daily Drama News Agency has just broken the story about the recently divorced songstress Kelly Clarkson’s engagement.
The 39-year-old judge on “The Voice” is reportedly walking on Cloud 9, and in absolute paradise.
Clarkson went through a very rough divorce from her husband, Brandon “Shithead” Blackstock.
Blackstock allegedly cheated on Kelly with two female midget clowns with the Ringling Brothers, Barnum & Bailey Circus.
An unnamed circus employee said he actually saw three photos of the menage-a-trois, and he remarked that it was not a pretty sight.
He laughed as he said that the three also included a life-size blow-up doll of Madonna, four cans or Reddi Whip Cream, black latex toddler crotchless panties for the two midgets, and a circus monkey.
According to information guru, Andy Cohen, Miss Clarkson, who has never been happier, is engaged to billionaire Houston oilman, Winthrop Harold Quackenbush, III, who owns 217 oil wells.
