Ex-mega-punk-frontman, Johnny Rotten, who now resembles an overweight walrus, has hit financially hard times.
Other members of the Sex Pistols asked Johnny to do a punk-revival tour in honour of mega-Nutter, Sid Vicious (RIP), but he refused because he was too busy acting like a monkey in the jungle on a TV reality show. However, he was sacked after telling other ex-celebs to "go fuck themselves".
Johnny returned to London penniless. He decided to flog his stock of sweaty, ripped T-shirts, designed by Vivian Westwood, including rusty safety pins. They fetched a couple-of-bob, but not enough to maintain his non-punk lifestyle.
He then discovered a set of his infamous green teeth, removed before becoming a celeb on US talk-shows and entertaining the US public with his 'Punker-isms', in his bathroom cabinet.
Sotheby's, renowned London auctioneers, flogged his green teeth for £2 million to a Sex Pistol's Nutter, ex-fan, and now a multi-millionaire producing vegan foods for ageing punks and hippies still hoping to change the world.
Johnny Rotten, now Lydon, bless his soul, is deep down a really great chap! He looks after and cares for his missus who is sadly very ill. I hope this Spoof will make millions which I will donate to his loving care.
NEVER MIND THE BOLLOCKS, PUNK WILL NEVER DIE!
