King Arthur’s Sword Found In a Detroit Pawn Shop

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 26 April 2021

image for King Arthur’s Sword Found In a Detroit Pawn Shop
The King Arthur sword was sitting next to a Fender Telecaster Guitar and a Detroit Red Wings hockey stick.

DETROIT – (Satire News) - The Detroit Police Department has just announced that they have taken possession of what is believed to be King Arthur’s favorite sword.

The sword, which he nicknamed "Betty," is believed to be about 1,587 years-old, measures 4-feet-11-inches long, and is 98.2% solid silver. The handle has the initials A.P.P. for Arthur Pablo Pendragon.

According to Reginald Dancer, a noted British historian, the sword was a birthday present to Arthur from his Welsh uncle, Cardigard Quickenberry, 59, who was noted for having invented Welsh Grape Jelly, whose spelling was later changed to Welch in the winter of 1783.

The manager of the MoTown Pawn Shop, Willie LeBron Franklin, said that the sword had been brought in by a 16-year-old girl high school cheerleader, who said she found it underneath the football stadium bleachers at Mrs. Henry Ford High School.

Mr. Dancer said that he estimates the sword’s value to be somewhere between $87,500 and $7.2 million.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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