Local drunk 'encapsulates the spirit of Princess Margaret' says Honey Boo Boo

Written by Clive Danton

Saturday, 25 January 2020

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A habitual Whitechapel drunkard has been lauded by reality TV star, Honey Boo Boo, who yesterday praised the man for mirroring the chaotic, drink-fuelled life of royal bad girl, Princess Margaret.

Miss Boo Boo, who was a guest at a Whitechapel town hall dinner and dance on Monday night, spoke out in praise of homeless Toby Dell, 54, after spotting him slumped on the steps of the Royal London Hospital with his dog on a piece of string, surrounded by empty cans of strong lager, and attempting to tune in a radio with no back to it.

Pointing to Dell, the Here Comes Honey Boo Boo star told newsmen: "That guy encapsulates the rebellious nature and wayward lifestyle of Princess Margaret.

"In fact, if he was sitting on a sunlounger in Mustique, having suncream rubbed into his thighs by toyboy, Roddy Llewelyn, you could be forgiven for thinking it actually was her.

Boo Boo, 52, is well-known for her love of the British royal family and once declared that she wouldn't mind testing the theory that Prince Edward was gay by offering him, "some real red-hot poontang."

Royal Footnote: In 1967, Princess Margaret once drank 15 pints of heavy in The Moon On The Mall public house in Whitehall, after which she staggered into Downing Street and began raining down punches on Prime Minister, Harold Wilson, who was leaving Number 10 to attend a miners' gala in Barnsley.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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