Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 28 February 2019

image for Man Got Sore Throat - Just Like Ozzie Osbourne
Ozzie - does he know more than he's letting on?

A man who contributed a story to a satirical news website, about rock singer Ozzie Osbourne getting a sore throat and having to cancel a tour to Australia, New Zealand and Japan, has come down with the very same condition, and can barely raise a croak.

Moys Kenwood wrote the story 'Ozzie Osbourne Has A Frog In His Throat' on TheSpoof.com on February 19, and started to notice his own throat gradually becoming drier and more irritable in the days that followed.

Finally, by February 26, his gullet felt as if it were being tickled with a feather, and, when he spoke, he sounded like gravel in a cement mixer. This morning, he could not raise anything above the aforementioned croak, and is now suspicious that his February 19 story might have had something to do with his present hoarse condition.

After sucking his way through a packet of Honey Strepsils, to little effect, Kenwood now considers witchcraft may be responsible for his bad luck.

Osbourne has been contacted by email for his comments, but has not yet replied due to his own continuing sore throat.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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