Hobbit Took Part In Amazing Adventure Claims Secret Report

Funny story written by Duff

Friday, 19 January 2007

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Bilbo Baggins: "Adventures and expeditions and all that sort of thing aren't really me to tell you the truth"

In a story that's more like something straight out of a blockbuster movie than real life, a Hobbit named Bilbo Baggins is denying that he has taken part in an amazing adventure.

However, The Spoof has seen a leaked copy of a top-secret report in which it's claimed that Bilbo (131) was visited by some Dwarves and virtually press-ganged onto their expedition. But here's where it goes totally crazy.

Bilbo then got lost in some mountains, found a magic ring, slew a fierce fire-breathing dragon and then came back home again. He told The Spoof:

"It's crazy and it doesn't really sound too much like me. Adventures and expeditions and all that sort of thing aren't really me to tell you the truth. I think you must have your wires crossed"

But 'lord of the boards' and top actor bloke, Sir Ian McKellen, comments:

"Well this simply must have happened or else how could we have made a famous trilogy that's broken box-office records around the world. If you ask me Mr Baggins is just being modest about his part in the whole adventure"

A bedraggled creature calling himself Gollum was heard to say:

"That fecker stole my ring, oh yesss. We hates him we do"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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