Hugh Hefner, the founder of the Playboy Empire has been appointed the 266th Pope in a dramatic turn of events. The Vatican were in a crisis meeting earlier this month following the 265th Pope, Benedict XVI recent diatribe on the Muslim community.
Hugh Hefner will be called Pope Hef I; is believed to bring reconciliation between people of different faiths, particularly the Christians and Muslims, which were badly damaged by Pope Benedict XVI. Pope Hef I experience in marketing will be a great asset during his papacy, as it did during the playboy era, when he managed to unite and penetrate every faith including the Buddhist monks into his readership.
Pope Hef I has promised reforms in the Church. In order to bring reconciliation between the faiths many things are to change during the tenure of Pope Hef I. For instance:
- Priests in the past were plagued by scandal, will now be allowed to marry
- Church attendance amongst men will increase, and hopefully attract some from the other faiths, thanks to the all new 'centrefold' nuns in the church choir.
- Pilgrimage will be observed at 'Sisters of the Mansion' for one week-end in Holmby Hills, Los Angeles, California, formally Playboy Mansion.
- Everyone will read the new and improved scriptures; complete with pictures.
Hopefully peace will reign on earth - Amen.
