ClearlyCriminal, FL Scamatology has always used their celebrity members to promote the church. However, as they lose regular members (four times as many Britons claim they are Jedi Warriors, as opposed to Scamatology), so too are many of their celebrities fleeing.
This includes some of the more vocal anti-Scamatologists, as many of them are speaking out in shocking ways with tell-all books and reality shows.
"It's getting harder to find celebrities that can be brainwashed, and more importantly, STAY brainwashed. Thankfully, we still have some of the most, shall I say, gullible? celebrities left still drinking the Kool-Aid," said a cult spokesperson.