Church of Satan Sues Led Zeppelin

Written by Vlad D.M. Paylaw

Saturday, 23 April 2016

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Charming and persuasive as ever

Auntie Sandra Levi, High Priestess of The Church of Satan, filed a lawsuit this week alleging that rock band Led Zeppelin plagiarized the copyrighted liturgy of her church.

"When they recorded the subliminal Satanic lyrics in Stairway to Heaven, they quoted verbatim from our Black Mass without asking permission!" she fumed. "I'd just tell them to go to hell, but they don't deserve that privilege."

When contacted by reporters via telephone (1-666-HELL) , the Prince of Darkness was characteristically warm and engaging, offering the following comment:

"My faithful servant on Earth has made progress, and gained at least a small measure of my wisdom. She knows enough to file a civil suit rather than curse her adversaries in my name. After all, I'm very busy planting dinosaur and hominid fossils, not to mention convincing geologists that the Earth is 4.5 billion years old. I have no time to get involved in copyright disputes."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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