A blessing from heaven has come down upon the earth. The conservative majority in the U.S. Supreme Court has brought down the wall separating church and state in a series of new rulings. Satanists, Kwanzaa followers, Hindus Of Shiva's Heart, Worsh…
Washington DC - (Rotters): The GOP inaugural committee is being sued for malfeasance in a pubic orifice for switching the Malleus Maleficarum - Hammer of Witches - satanic primer with the customary Lincoln Bible for Donald Trump’s pledging of the Pr...
Washington DC, USA - Donald Trump was initiated into the British Hellfire Club according to Chapter 666 of the Mueller Report. De-redacted federal papers describe events circa 1963 when the ageing Queen Mother acted as a ceremonial douche - uh, su...
Auntie Sandra Levi, High Priestess of The Church of Satan, filed a lawsuit this week alleging that rock band Led Zeppelin plagiarized the copyrighted liturgy of her church. "When they recorded the subliminal Satanic lyrics in Stairway to Heaven, t...
Reverend Gerry Fallguy, minister at the Suffering Jesus Christ Baptist church in Atlanta and founder of the Moral Immaturity movement, called reporters to his church last week to announce a startling discovery: "I took my kids to see the "Minions"...
Juneau, Alaska - "Bigfoot sightings, yes! Weird Russian-speaking aliens, yes! But satanists? On MY watch?? There were categorically NO satanists in North Pole or anywhere else in Alaska while I was Governor," Sarah Palin said today. "Besides, as...
Cambridge, Massachusetts - Scientists have frightened the bejaysus out of millions of furry little critters by implanting inaccurate memories in their brains in experiments aiming to explain false-memory syndrome. Yeah, that's right. In scenes...
"To think I kissed her (or him) there--and there--and ''there''! - Sarah Michelle Gellar Although some contend that Baphomet is a Marvel Comics super-villain, Baphomet is really the demon of parties and partygoers west of the Mississippi. As such, he (or she) is often depicted at parties in Las Vegas, Hollyweird, and various family nudist camps in Arizona and New Mexico, and some Oregonians inc...
London - Police have found the dead perv's millions in a Swiss slush fund for brats of satanic hos. Their existence has been a government secret ever since the year dot according to sources at Operation Upper Gumtree. It means that Savile bough...
MUSKOGEE, Oklahoma (ABSNN) - When Oklahoma District Judge Mike Norman sentenced a teenaged youth who caused his friend's death in a car crash to church for ten years, he likely thought the boy would choose an evangelical church like the Nazarenes or...
London - A shadowy Illuminati offshoot has red carded domestic goddess Nigella Lawson's new spring chicken recipe. Barking Seventh Day Adventist Dentists' Allotment Society has banned her 'summer solstice spatchcock chicken nuggets in a red wine j...
Cornwall - Local scrimshaw foragers said today a decapitated horse's head on a Cornwall beach had three Prince of Wales albatross feathers stuck in its snout. It was found washed up on Pentegwam Bay just weeks after a mutilated pregnant mare's co...
Cornwall - Notorious satanic members of the UK's premier demonic closed shop are being investigated about the wanton mutilation of a Freisian two year-old called Erik. The stallion was found in dead in a Stithians field in what police suspect may...
Atheist loon and evolution crackpot Richard Dawkins now imagines that he knows how Jesus thinks. The troubled children's author continues to plummet further into the realms of fantasy. Only last week he displayed his ignorance of the Bible, when h...
Atheist fundamentalist and evolution crackpot Richard Dawkins has finally broken the silence as to why he refuses to debate Professor William Lane Craig. Dawkins claims that it is due to Lane Craigs biblical beliefs! As Lane Craig is a theologian...
Atheist fundamentalist and evolutionary crackpot Richard Dawkins has now got the your children in his sights! Having turned his tail and ran from a debate with Professor William Lane Craig, Dawkins has now decided to lower his sights and plans on...
The UK's first, last and only Church of the Anarchist, is closing its doors after being open for just one month. "We were meant to be the Church of the Antichrist," sighed founder, Bill Garcon. "The sign-writer couldn't read my handwriting though.
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