Merrit Wever Gives The Shortest Emmy Award Acceptance Speech in History

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

image for Merrit Wever Gives The Shortest Emmy Award Acceptance Speech in History
Merrit said that she had to make a beeline for the little girls room.

HOLLYWOOD - Merrit Wever, who is not exactly a household name in the celebrity world, won an Emmy for Best Supporting Actress for her role on HBO's Nurse Jane.

Wever did something that 99.9 percent of the winners cannot do. She actually took her award, gave an 11 word acceptance speech, and left the stage.

Everyone in the Nokia Theater was shocked including the Emmy Award Show band who usually have to play music to get the long-winded winners to wrap it up; usually once they start thanking uncles, aunts, cousins, and elementary school teachers.

Wever was asked backstage by Tahiti Zeppelin with Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres why she ended up in that embarrassing situation.

Merrit blushed and whispered that prior to hearing the names nominated in her category she had nervously drank 7 Diet Dr. Peppers and once she got up on stage the urge to pee suddenly hit her due to the excitement and so it was adios and vamoose pronto to the little girls room.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Ms. Wever's 11-word acceptance speech was: Hi, thank you. I have got to go pee, bye-bye..]

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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