Carmen Electra Reveals Why She Broke Up With Simon Cowell

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 15 August 2013

image for Carmen Electra Reveals Why She Broke Up With Simon Cowell
People who know Lauren Silverman say that the woman can smell money half a mile away. (Photo courtesy of Kobe Bryant).

EL SEGUNDO, California - Carmen Electra had just finished her dinner at The Fiery Tongue of The Dragon Diner when she was approached by Vodka Vermicelli with iRumors.

Miss Electra was asked about the situation that her ex-boyfriend Simon Cowell now finds himself in with his best friend's wife expecting his baby.

Carmen shook her head and remarked that she knew that (Lauren) Silverman was going to try and find a way to latch on to the X-Factor guru and the conniving socialite did.

The sultry Electra said that she had not really talked about her breakup with the man known as The Count of Criticism but now that it is out she will talk about it to clear the air.

She said that her and Simon were having a great relationship until that evil woman came into the picture. Lauren, or Boopsie as Simon called her, had an agenda and she stuck to it like Krazy Glue between two Popsicle Sticks.

Mrs. Silverman lured poor, little, simple Simon into her spider web and he got all tangled up and now Mrs. Silverman is going to be one very, very rich gold digger.

Carmen said that she finally decided to dump the cheating Cowell when she caught him and Boopsie doing the horizontal hokey pokey on his kitchen table.

SIDENOTE: A Close friend of Simon's has said that Lauren is even starting to wear black T-shirts just like her baby daddy, Simon "The Crotch Puppet" Cowell.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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